Day 8 - Genesis 34-36 & 1 Chronicles 1:28-2:2 (8/26/10)
Genesis 24
So tonight I picked this chapter because all through Genesis women have been taken as wives in exchange for property (animals, riches, land, etc.). Women don't have much of a choice in the matter. Their fathers decide for them. Now I know this practice was in place for long after this time period, but it gets me thinking about womens' roles in todays society.
Note: I believe this journal entry may cause some negative uproar in my fellow females, but please keep an open mind and know I understand no two women are alike and that this is just one thought process of mine. :)
I think that women have got to be the most confusing and most indecisive creatures out there. After years of women before us fighting to get out of the kitchen and into the workplace, we sit today and get upset when men don't want to take care of us. I have to admitt that I use to be one of those women who wanted a career, wanted to be successful, wanted to be as good if not better then my male counterparts. Then I would get upset when a man would expect me to take care of myself, whether it be a meal on a date or emotionally or whatever. It took me a few years of dating to realize that although I don't want my father to pick my husband (however maybe he would do a better job then me at the rate I am going), I do want a man to be my man, to be my rock. I still believe that in a relationship men and women should be mostly equal, but I think society has made it difficult for girls to grow up as true stong women and boys to grow up to be men. Us women expect so much from men, yet we don't always allow them to be men. When I look back on my dating history I would get upset when someone I was trying to date wouldn't step up and be a man, but I recently realized I never allowed them to do what I wanted. To point out a few things: I wanted a man to pay for our meal on a date, but I would ask if he wanted me to get my portion. I wanted a man to initiate communication with me, but instead of giving him time to do so I would initiate the communication. I wanted a man to come up with date ideas, but I would always suggest things instead of giving him time to voice his ideas. Why do women do these things? Are we so sure that we can do anything that we try to be both the man and the woman in the relationship? Daily I pray and challenge myself to be a woman that will allow the man I will eventually have in my life to be the man I know he can be and the man I want and need in my life as a partner.
Thursday, August 26, 2010
Fear, A Motivator
Day 7 - Genesis 29-33
Genesis 32 - Jacob prepares to meet Esau
In this chapter we read about all the things Jacob did to prepare for when he was to meet Esau and the four hundred men that were with Esau. Not only did Jacob divide his belongings and relatives and servants he also prepared gifts of his possession for his brother in hopes to be looked upon with favor in Esau's eyes. Jacob did all of this because he was afraid. What do we do when we are afraid? Do we make a plan and follow through? Not very often. Do we prepare gifts for those we are fearful of? Not really. What do we do? I know what I do... I either avoid the situation completely or I take the taurean route and strike with my horns and hope it all turns out for the best. Neither is a very good option. Why do we take either one extreme or the other? Why don't we search for the middle ground? The most pleasing route for everyone. Fear is a huge motivator, but how does it motivate you? Does it motivate you to do good or bad or nothing? I pray the next time I am afraid, I allow it to motivate me in a positive way. The bull horns will have to be put away for that one!
Genesis 32 - Jacob prepares to meet Esau
In this chapter we read about all the things Jacob did to prepare for when he was to meet Esau and the four hundred men that were with Esau. Not only did Jacob divide his belongings and relatives and servants he also prepared gifts of his possession for his brother in hopes to be looked upon with favor in Esau's eyes. Jacob did all of this because he was afraid. What do we do when we are afraid? Do we make a plan and follow through? Not very often. Do we prepare gifts for those we are fearful of? Not really. What do we do? I know what I do... I either avoid the situation completely or I take the taurean route and strike with my horns and hope it all turns out for the best. Neither is a very good option. Why do we take either one extreme or the other? Why don't we search for the middle ground? The most pleasing route for everyone. Fear is a huge motivator, but how does it motivate you? Does it motivate you to do good or bad or nothing? I pray the next time I am afraid, I allow it to motivate me in a positive way. The bull horns will have to be put away for that one!
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
A Christian's Wealth
Day 6 - Genesis 23-28
Genesis 26:12 "Isaac planted crops in that land and the same year reaped a hundredfold, because the Lord blessed him."
Isaac "reaped hundred fold because the Lord blessed him." I think so many times people feel that Christians should not be wealthy people. This verse and many like it contradict that notion. The Lord blesses His followers in many ways. Love, life, happiness, comfort, etc. Christians have a different set of values so for them to be wealthy does not mean with material things, however. I got to thinking about this and I wonder if God will not bring unnecessary struggles, including financial to those who have truly given their heart to Him. For those of us who place more value on the material things do we sometimes end up in a struggle we have created for ourselves? Credit card debt, second and third mortgage debt, gambling debt, drug and/or alcohol addiction, etc. are these struggles that we have placed upon ourselves because God is not our center? How many of our struggles could be avoided if we placed God at the center of our hearts and lives? Now I am not saying a Christian's life is easy peesy, no, I am saying struggles they bring upon themselves may be different and that they are more apt to recognize their struggles as opportunities for growth not only as individuals or families, but as Christians. It is during these times of struggles they lean on their friends, family, and faith to get through a struggle and come out a better person and a better Christian with a greater love for God, their families, and even themselves. I need to remember that each and every struggle I have is an opportunity for growth as an individual, Christian, and for my relationship with God and others. "No problems, only solutions!"
Genesis 26:12 "Isaac planted crops in that land and the same year reaped a hundredfold, because the Lord blessed him."
Isaac "reaped hundred fold because the Lord blessed him." I think so many times people feel that Christians should not be wealthy people. This verse and many like it contradict that notion. The Lord blesses His followers in many ways. Love, life, happiness, comfort, etc. Christians have a different set of values so for them to be wealthy does not mean with material things, however. I got to thinking about this and I wonder if God will not bring unnecessary struggles, including financial to those who have truly given their heart to Him. For those of us who place more value on the material things do we sometimes end up in a struggle we have created for ourselves? Credit card debt, second and third mortgage debt, gambling debt, drug and/or alcohol addiction, etc. are these struggles that we have placed upon ourselves because God is not our center? How many of our struggles could be avoided if we placed God at the center of our hearts and lives? Now I am not saying a Christian's life is easy peesy, no, I am saying struggles they bring upon themselves may be different and that they are more apt to recognize their struggles as opportunities for growth not only as individuals or families, but as Christians. It is during these times of struggles they lean on their friends, family, and faith to get through a struggle and come out a better person and a better Christian with a greater love for God, their families, and even themselves. I need to remember that each and every struggle I have is an opportunity for growth as an individual, Christian, and for my relationship with God and others. "No problems, only solutions!"
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
Door #1 or Door #2
Day 5 - Genesis 19-22
Genesis 22 - Abraham Tested
In Genesis 22 Abraham is tested. That is the title of the chapter "Abraham Tested". Such a short descriptor for such heavy stuff going on in this chapter. Abraham's test... sacrifice his son. And this is just a test. This was God's way of finding out if Abraham truly feared Him. My how things have changed. Today, if someone said God is testing them and they have to sacrifice their son, they would be locked up in a mental ward! Shoot, most of the visions those in the Bible talk of seeing being the Lord are "lock up" worthy things in this day and age. That aside, Abraham passes this test because he gets his son to were the sacrifice was suppose to take place, builds an alter, and has Isaac tied to the alter ready for sacrifice. Wow, talk about fear of the Lord and because Abraham passed this test, instead of Isaac, a bull was sacrificed. I can't imagine being Abraham with his son on the alter ready to kill his son, heavy. Now I know we do a lot of things different then they did then. When was the last time we sacrificed something living on an alter at church? We don't. our sacrifices for the Lord are much different now. Now we sacrifice "things of the world". We sacrifice our "normalcy". Ultimately we sacrifice those things we have, enjoy, want, etc that keep us from the Lord. Those things which give us temporary pleasure for the possibility of eternal joy. Seems like a no brainer... "Ladies and Gentlemen, behind door #1 we have 30 minutes of pleasure and behind door #2 we have eternal joy! Which do you choose?" Again, seems like an obvious choice, but so many times we choose door #1. Why do we make the eternal sacrifice? Shouldn't we want eternal joy? Aren't the statistics saying eternal is way longer and more than 30 minutes? Yes everything says that we should choose door #2, but because of our instant gratification society, we want the joy and pleasure NOW! However, it is that instant gratification that is causing so many of us to sacrifice our eternal joy and those wonderful mansions on the streets of gold that are waiting for us for the shacks we have here on earth.
Genesis 22 - Abraham Tested
In Genesis 22 Abraham is tested. That is the title of the chapter "Abraham Tested". Such a short descriptor for such heavy stuff going on in this chapter. Abraham's test... sacrifice his son. And this is just a test. This was God's way of finding out if Abraham truly feared Him. My how things have changed. Today, if someone said God is testing them and they have to sacrifice their son, they would be locked up in a mental ward! Shoot, most of the visions those in the Bible talk of seeing being the Lord are "lock up" worthy things in this day and age. That aside, Abraham passes this test because he gets his son to were the sacrifice was suppose to take place, builds an alter, and has Isaac tied to the alter ready for sacrifice. Wow, talk about fear of the Lord and because Abraham passed this test, instead of Isaac, a bull was sacrificed. I can't imagine being Abraham with his son on the alter ready to kill his son, heavy. Now I know we do a lot of things different then they did then. When was the last time we sacrificed something living on an alter at church? We don't. our sacrifices for the Lord are much different now. Now we sacrifice "things of the world". We sacrifice our "normalcy". Ultimately we sacrifice those things we have, enjoy, want, etc that keep us from the Lord. Those things which give us temporary pleasure for the possibility of eternal joy. Seems like a no brainer... "Ladies and Gentlemen, behind door #1 we have 30 minutes of pleasure and behind door #2 we have eternal joy! Which do you choose?" Again, seems like an obvious choice, but so many times we choose door #1. Why do we make the eternal sacrifice? Shouldn't we want eternal joy? Aren't the statistics saying eternal is way longer and more than 30 minutes? Yes everything says that we should choose door #2, but because of our instant gratification society, we want the joy and pleasure NOW! However, it is that instant gratification that is causing so many of us to sacrifice our eternal joy and those wonderful mansions on the streets of gold that are waiting for us for the shacks we have here on earth.
"I wish I had..."
Day 4 - Genesis 15-18
Genesis 18:15 "Sarah was afraid, so she lied and said, "I did not laugh." But He said, "Yes, you did laugh."
Isn't it interesting what we say and do when we are afraid? Even though the Lord was in Sarah's presence she still lied because she was afraid. This takes me back to when i was a kid and my parents caught me red-handed doing something yet I would still say I didn't do it because I was afraid. Why aren't we fearful of what will happen if we lie, we only think of what will happen if we tell the truth. Why is it that those consequences always seem so much worse then the consequences of telling a lie? What good has ever come from a lie, only good comes from truth, but we don't think about that. And what about the times we lie when the truth needs to be said. We even lie not because we are afraid of the bad that will happen, but we lie because we are truly afraid of the possible joy and good that could happen. For example, instead of saying "I love you" we say nothing. why do we worry so much about not hearing those words back? What is greater then love and shouldn't it be selfless? We say that it is, but when we don't say it aren't we being selfish because we are afraid we won't hear it back? That is not selfless love, that is love with the expectation of love in return. Why do we risk so much possibility of love and joy because we are afraid we won't hear "I love you" back. Someone once told me that they couldn't believe that I love so hard and that I don't fear the what if. It isn't that I don't fear the what if, I fear the having to say "I wish I had..." there are situations in my pas that I think "I wish I had" and that is far worse of a feeling then any other risk out there. So I continue to challenge myself to live without the "I wish I had..."
Genesis 18:15 "Sarah was afraid, so she lied and said, "I did not laugh." But He said, "Yes, you did laugh."
Isn't it interesting what we say and do when we are afraid? Even though the Lord was in Sarah's presence she still lied because she was afraid. This takes me back to when i was a kid and my parents caught me red-handed doing something yet I would still say I didn't do it because I was afraid. Why aren't we fearful of what will happen if we lie, we only think of what will happen if we tell the truth. Why is it that those consequences always seem so much worse then the consequences of telling a lie? What good has ever come from a lie, only good comes from truth, but we don't think about that. And what about the times we lie when the truth needs to be said. We even lie not because we are afraid of the bad that will happen, but we lie because we are truly afraid of the possible joy and good that could happen. For example, instead of saying "I love you" we say nothing. why do we worry so much about not hearing those words back? What is greater then love and shouldn't it be selfless? We say that it is, but when we don't say it aren't we being selfish because we are afraid we won't hear it back? That is not selfless love, that is love with the expectation of love in return. Why do we risk so much possibility of love and joy because we are afraid we won't hear "I love you" back. Someone once told me that they couldn't believe that I love so hard and that I don't fear the what if. It isn't that I don't fear the what if, I fear the having to say "I wish I had..." there are situations in my pas that I think "I wish I had" and that is far worse of a feeling then any other risk out there. So I continue to challenge myself to live without the "I wish I had..."
Babel
Day 3 - Genesis 11-14
Genesis 11:8-9 "So the Lord scattered them from there over all the earth, and they stopped building the city. That is why it was called Babel because there the Lord confused the language of the whole world. From there the Lord scattered them over the face of the whole earth."
The land of Babel... aka Stephanie's brain! So God caused mass confusion by changing languages and He kept them from being able to communicate and therefore kept them from being able to build a city and tower that would reach the heavens. Sometimes I wonder if God causes mass confusion in my brain. There are days where I cannot make sense of any thought in my brain. There are days where I open my mouth and no one (not even myself) understands. However, I wonder why God didn't want the men to be able to do the impossible? It is said "through God all things are possible", so were these men not acting for God? I know that unfortunately I am not always acting for God, could that be why my brain is like Babel at times? Hmmm... now that is an interesting thought. I will have to ponder that one.
Genesis 11:8-9 "So the Lord scattered them from there over all the earth, and they stopped building the city. That is why it was called Babel because there the Lord confused the language of the whole world. From there the Lord scattered them over the face of the whole earth."
The land of Babel... aka Stephanie's brain! So God caused mass confusion by changing languages and He kept them from being able to communicate and therefore kept them from being able to build a city and tower that would reach the heavens. Sometimes I wonder if God causes mass confusion in my brain. There are days where I cannot make sense of any thought in my brain. There are days where I open my mouth and no one (not even myself) understands. However, I wonder why God didn't want the men to be able to do the impossible? It is said "through God all things are possible", so were these men not acting for God? I know that unfortunately I am not always acting for God, could that be why my brain is like Babel at times? Hmmm... now that is an interesting thought. I will have to ponder that one.
The Rainbow
Day 2 - Genesis 7-10 & 1 Chronicles 1:5-27
Genesis 9:13 "I have set my rainbow in the clouds, and it will be the sign of the covenant between me and the earth"
So tonight's reading took me to the verse which explains why I love rainbows and why, if you ever see me look at a rainbow, I will look like a smiling buffoon. To me a rainbow is a way of God's continual communication with us. God's way of saying I am still here and I still remember this covenant I made a very very long time ago. When I think about why God destroyed the earth then, I can only imagine how He feels about His creations now. In a society where so many "evil" things are just accepted and where cursing in a school is more okay then a child praying before a meal, what must God think of us now and what must He be feeling now. It must be like when a parent watches their child going an "evil" direction and they can't do anything to help or change it. But God can, so either He isn't or He is and we are ignoring it or maybe there is something big around the corner that God is planning. Maybe there is a present day Noah building and "ark" for the next "flush" of all evil. Until then, I am going to be that smiling buffoon when I see a rainbow!
Genesis 9:13 "I have set my rainbow in the clouds, and it will be the sign of the covenant between me and the earth"
So tonight's reading took me to the verse which explains why I love rainbows and why, if you ever see me look at a rainbow, I will look like a smiling buffoon. To me a rainbow is a way of God's continual communication with us. God's way of saying I am still here and I still remember this covenant I made a very very long time ago. When I think about why God destroyed the earth then, I can only imagine how He feels about His creations now. In a society where so many "evil" things are just accepted and where cursing in a school is more okay then a child praying before a meal, what must God think of us now and what must He be feeling now. It must be like when a parent watches their child going an "evil" direction and they can't do anything to help or change it. But God can, so either He isn't or He is and we are ignoring it or maybe there is something big around the corner that God is planning. Maybe there is a present day Noah building and "ark" for the next "flush" of all evil. Until then, I am going to be that smiling buffoon when I see a rainbow!
God's Image
Day 1 - Genesis 1-6 & 1 Chronicles 1:1-4
Genesis 1:27 "So God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them."
We were made in God's image. Isn't that something to think about. All of us imperfect humans, made in the image of God. God, the most perfect. And what's more, He loves us. Imperfections and all this God loves us. I sit and think about all the different ways we (even myself) imagine God. All the majestic ideas of what/who God is. Do we ever think to simply look at our family, friends, co-workers, or even the person practically sitting on our lap next to us on an airplane? If we were made in His image then we should be able to see God all day every day (assuming of course we leave our humble abodes). The next time you want to see God, don't think you have to climb Mt. Everest (although since He created that too, yes He would be there), but for us less motivated to climb, remember God is in all of us humans. Yes even that guy next to us in traffic picking his nose, God is there. I wonder, if everyone looked upon others as they would God, how much hate, violence, cruelty, and other spiritual poisons would there be in this world? So as I lay my head down tonight, I am reminded that tomorrow at work God's image will surround me and that makes all the obstacles I will face seem a little bit better.
Genesis 1:27 "So God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them."
We were made in God's image. Isn't that something to think about. All of us imperfect humans, made in the image of God. God, the most perfect. And what's more, He loves us. Imperfections and all this God loves us. I sit and think about all the different ways we (even myself) imagine God. All the majestic ideas of what/who God is. Do we ever think to simply look at our family, friends, co-workers, or even the person practically sitting on our lap next to us on an airplane? If we were made in His image then we should be able to see God all day every day (assuming of course we leave our humble abodes). The next time you want to see God, don't think you have to climb Mt. Everest (although since He created that too, yes He would be there), but for us less motivated to climb, remember God is in all of us humans. Yes even that guy next to us in traffic picking his nose, God is there. I wonder, if everyone looked upon others as they would God, how much hate, violence, cruelty, and other spiritual poisons would there be in this world? So as I lay my head down tonight, I am reminded that tomorrow at work God's image will surround me and that makes all the obstacles I will face seem a little bit better.
The Adventure
8/18/2010
Recently, I was given the opportunity to have a lot fewer distractions in my life then usual. At first this seemed to be a negative, but I got to thinking about this and realized it was truly a blessing. Instead of worrying about where I was going or what I was going to do, I sat back. I did nothing. I relaxed. I played with my cat and dog. Watched them play. Watched a lot of TV. Worked. Worked. Worked. Etc. Then it hit me one day, "Stephanie work on YOU!" I realized that although I was happy, i was not equalized. My triangle was not an equilibrium triangle. So, I was taken back to my YMCA days and realized that the mission statement, which I had to memorize, was on to something. I needed to work on all three parts of the triangle mind, body, and spirit. My mind was definitely worked everyday, but what about a commitment to my body and spirit. Sure I had my moments of "working out", but never stuck to it. I had bought "the One Year Bible", but only read two days. It was time to really get myself equalized. So I started P90X in the beginning of August. I would say that was an aggressive move, but I am doing it and actually enjoying it (most of the time). Today was the day I decided to commit to my spirit. In order to help I am going to keep this spirit journal to dialog and keep an account of my journey. My journey of searching... Searching for Stephanie!
In order to help my on this search for Stephanie, I am challenging myself to read the Bible in chronological order in the next 12 months. Each day I will read a section of the Bible and will identify a verse or verses that spoke to me in one way or the other. This verse (or verses) will be the motivation for my journal entry. The biggest challenge will be to take a hard look at myself, challenging myself to be honest and raw with my spirituality and even my emotions. I invite you to read my journal entries and challenge yourself to do the same. This adventure will take discipline and dedication, but I am excited for this adventure and hope others may gleam something positive from it! I pray the Lord will bless this adventure and anyone who chooses to follow my adventure or begin their own.
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